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The rock icon, oftentimes depressed and frustrated at everything, was babbling but rather comprehensively when he sang his tribute to his mother, Julia Stanley — oceanchild, seashell eyes — who died by a rampaging car driven by a drunk policeman when John was 18.

Julia was John’s friend, music teacher (she taught her to play banjo) and playmate. Most important, as John would later make known to the world in the very few instances when he showed his insecurities, that she was his father.

John, of course, knew who his dad was. At about five, John Winston Lennon was made to choose by Alfred, who suddenly popped up in their door to claim the would-be superstar. Longing for the embrace of his dad, John chose Alfred, but when Julia was about to turn her back on the pair sobbing, John ran out for Julia. They never heard from Alfred again.

But John committed the same sin as Alfred’s. In 1968, John left son Julian (named after Julia)—then also about five, in the arms of her mother Cynthia, for a long hippie cruise with Yoko Ono, until his death on Dec. 8, 1980 at the hands of a crazed fan.

Like John, Julian only had a few, selected memories of his father. And even when his songs hit the charts starting in 1985, his prose spoke directly to a father with whom he never had the chance to share dreams with. When he talked “Now you’re in heaven,” and it’s now “Too late for goodbyes,” his emotions came out, not just for John but for Cynthia.

Yet in dedicating his first album, Vallote to his mom, Julian cited the hardships Cynthia had to face to make their living. She was Julian’s father, too.

Yes, even mothers can be fathers, Mother Mary among them.

It was Mary who carried the brunt and pain of Jesus’ death. And although St. Joseph, a faithful and patient man as described in the Books of Matthew and Luke, helped bring up the young Jesus, unlike Alfred and John, he was nowhere heard (and read) when the sufferings came for the Son of God.

Yet, all fathers (the faithful ones, my dad included) deserve commendation for staying faithful to fatherhood. But I believe Father’s Day was a reaction to Mother’s Day, which all mothers deserve, whether they’ve been faithful to motherhood.

They’re crass commercialization, but only a few care.

Mother’s Days bring out the best in the closet and in the department store shelves.

Name it, and they’ll come out. Diamond rings, pricey wristwatches, the nicest clothes.

Scour the papers today, and the best fathers get are offers for gastronomic treats. No diamond rings, no pricey wristwactches, not even the nicest slacks (which all look similar, by the way).

So, why greet fathers a Happy Father’s Day?

Well, many among us have not been faithful to fatherhood and our wives. Ask John and Alfred, when you see them.

That explains why the best we get are restaurant treats.

They don’t even care to buy us a Beatles CD. Darn!